Diddums Drunk, Take One.

What is it that I'm supposed to do that's going to make things normal between the two of us again? Cause I don't know how.

There's an overwhelming desire to talk to the person that I met two weeks ago, but I don't see him at all anymore and I have to wonder if he's ever going to come back.

I just see a dick.

Exscuse my bluntness.

Anyway. I will have a car on Wednesday and I will have time to give you a celebatory blowjob (Post interview obviously. I'm going to get a job because I'm amazing), and then, get out of your face because I don't think you value me for anything else.

You should take up the offer because while I am apparently ruining my undefinable friendship with you, I've recently discovered how much I do infact miss sex and well, you have a big dick.

And since all you're capable of giving me these days is dickishness and a giant dick, I think I should make the best of the situation and use what's available.

And I am unbelievably drunk and in dire need of someone to shake me senseless because you sir, are no good.